Dear Unicorn Scholar,
What would a unicorn do if mounted by a koala unexpectedly?
Love,
The Goss
Well Goss,
It would be highly unlikely that koala would ever mount a unicorn. 1) Koalas are not attracted to unicorns. 2) Koalas are probably asleep.
However, if a unicorn is mounted, it will go along with it because it believes in the free love movement. However, this has the unfortunate side-effect of making unicorns the most raped animal.
a. cecil
distractedbutton
Sophia Michael
elsie69
cococoaltrain
falloutboyfiend
gumshoe123
moptop2010
bagoffleas
goyluver
Dearest most intelligent Unicorn Scholar,
How do you define the sexual orientation of a unicorn? If a unicorn is a male does it have a penis? If it is a woman a vagina? Can they be attracted to the same sex? Can a human date a unicorn? So many unanswered questions….
Love the ever so curious,
Strawberry Jam
The Unicorn Scholar is currently on leave in the eighth circle of Dante’s Inferno: it turns out he was actually not a scholar and God wanted to punish him for fraud. He was actually a pedophile.
He’s probably dead or on fire or something.
Actually you know what I’ll just find a new unicorn scholar. Yeah.
DO NOT ANSWER FOR THE UNICORN SCHOLAR
THE UNICORN SCHOLAR WILL CONSIDER YOUR QUESTION, STRAWBERRY JAM, AND PERHAPS SHALL ANSWER IT
I already found a new one Adam. I think redemption is beyond the current child molesting one that you found. Where the heck did you ever find that creep anyways. Probably on the subway in New York or something.
Adam: (Hey, it’s a legit unicorn, gotta make the best of this) Mister Unicorn are you a scholar?
Pedocorn: Uh… sure. Kid, how old are you?
Adam: I’m 12
Pedocorn: Perfect, wanna come over to my apartment and I’ll teach you all about the sexual habits of unicorns?
Adam: OH YEAAAAH. http://traintohell.com/misc/koolaidman.jpg
Adam you have to stop contacting the Unicorn molester. It’s not good for you. You should really call the police. STOP DOING THIS TO YOURSELF.
Stop being stupid.
Too late, the Academic Unicorn has been created.
http://mythicalhornedhorses.wordpress.com/2011/01/09/ask-a-unicorn-scholar-4/
http://mythicalhornedhorses.wordpress.com/2011/01/09/inquire-over-a-cup-of-tea-with-the-academic-unicorn/ this should help
Get your own questions, douche.
Adam i think this can work, your unicorn can answer them in an abstract sense while mine is more realistic and a woman. TAG TEAM.
PERHAPS A COMPROMISE CAN BE REACHED
Okay, now for the real question. Is their name an intentional Animal Collective reference?
No.
That was revealing post!